Why was he here?
by blair4eva
Summary: C/B fiction. How will Chuck and Blair handle the hard times? Episode 13 SPOILERS


_Hi Everyone! This is my first fanfic so I hope you enjoy! Reviews would be greatly appriciated! I know this is a little on the sad side, but I think we all know 13 is going to be a hard ep for us all CB fans to watch!!! Thanks for reviewing and I can't wait for Monday!_

_xoxo Maggie_

Why was he here? He knew why he was there, the death of this father, he just couldn't understand why he was in the same room with all of these random people. Wakes are supposed to be the time when everyone says they are sorry and he was a great man, crap, crap, crap he thought. He didn't want to hear it anymore. The staff had kept his scotch coming. There was no Bart Bass to tell them to minimize the serving of this special drink to his son, so Chuck took advantage of it to the fullest.

He looked around at the people…staring. Staring at him, staring at Lily, and the rest of his pseudo family that was all he had now. One particular set of eyes caught his attention though, Blair. She looked pale, and tired. If you could imagine puppy eyes on a beautiful girl than you would know what he was looking at. He quickly looked away because looking at her made him want to feel and that was the last thing he was ready to do. At this point his drink was empty and so were his insides. "Screw this" he whispered out loud, grabbing his coat he motioned toward the elevator. Having no idea where he was going he called his driver and asked him to be ready out front.

Walking through the lobby felt so surreal, like today wasn't happening, it couldn't be happening. Earlier there was the funeral. He decided going to this event sober wasn't a great idea, so scotch it was. And he was a mess. Any other day he would not have gotten that drunk. He was slurring and staggering and could barely hold himself up. At one point Blair and Nate had to help him walk up a grassy knoll. That wasn't one of his finer moments. When they came over this knoll though he spotted someone he hadn't noticed before. Dan Humphrey. What the hell was he doing here??? He had no right!!!!!!!!Next thing he knew he was running, which was no small feet considering the help he was just requiring.

"_What the hell are you doing here!" he yelled. "You are the last person that should be any where near my father's funeral after what you did!" _

"_I didn't do anything Chuck" Dan retorted. "I didn't publish the article! I know I messed up and I wanted to pay my respects."_

"_Pay your respects? Your respects and inquisitions are what put my dad where he is right now!! How dare you come here to pay your respects!" Chuck yelled angrily while moving closer to Dan while motioning his arms up and down as if to start a fight. _

"_Chuck stop it! " Serena interrupted. "This isn't the time or the place for you two to be having this conversation!"_

"_Oh, really sister? You are standing up for your little boyfriend here? How freaking appropriate for today! I should have figured you would choose Humphrey's side over your families."_

"_Chuck you aren't the only one hurting today! We all are! And I am not choosing Dan's side.I just.. don't want to see you like this.. you're hurting.." She screamed back. _

"_Whatever Serena, consider yourself relieved of any sisterly duties from now on. When my father died so did our family" Chuck was very stern and serious this time. He knew he didn't mean it, but it just came out anyways._

_Finally Blair and interjected, "Come on Chuck" she whispered. "Let's get out of here". With a slight struggle and a gentle nudge he agreed_.

**______________________________________________________________________ **

They sat in the limo in silence. She wasn't sure what to say to him. Why was she here? She asked herself. He hadn't asked her to be, but she felt compelled to be there. Like something was drawing her to him. She always felt this way but today was more, oh she couldn't think of a work to describe it but it was more intense I guess you could say. She looked over at him as he stared out the window. Here they were in the spot where they made love made memories and now it was such a different feeling. She almost felt guilty for thinking about the first time they had in the back of the limo at this moment, but how could she not she thought. It was an amazing night. No questions asked no pressure just pure lust and later she found out love. Love. This was a word she had yet to use to describe her relationship with Chuck. But it was true. She did love him. And today she felt more love for him than she ever had before. He was like a stray puppy. No. A lost puppy. Nowhere to go and she just wanted to help him. She needed to help him.

They went to the penthouse where the wake had already begun. She could tell he was reluctant to go especially when people started coming up to him and expressing their condolences. Very nice ones, but she could tell by the look on his face he was not happy. She watched him take a seat on the couch and immediately got one of the staff's attentions to bring him a drink, scotch no doubt. Lord knows he didn't need anymore. He had enough today for everyone in that room, but she wasn't going to tell him not to drink more because well she understood. When she and Nate had helped him up the knoll they looked at each other with a look of what to do? Neither of them knew of course. This was the first time they had ever seen Chuck lose his cool. He normally had everything in his life under control. So to see him like this sent a wave of confusion over the two of them.

As she was thinking about the days events she noticed him look at her. She stared. It was the first time he had looked at her all day and she was hoping it would be the moment where she could finally see what was going on in those eyes. Hoping the eyes would reveal more than he had to her. But as quickly as his eyes had made contact with hers they were gone again, and nothing. She didn't see anything revealing in his eyes, which scared her more than if she had. She turned for a moment as someone behind her asked her a question about the family and when she had turned back around he was gone. Panic came over her. Where had he gone? She looked over towards the elevator and just caught the last glimpse of him entering it. She had arrived at the elevator just as the doors closed. Crap. She missed it. She needed to get down to the lobby to see where he was going. Stairs. Luckily she was wearing her flats today. She ran down the stairs floor by floor exhausted when she reached the lobby but she just saw him walk out the front door…

______________________________________________________________________

When he exited the lobby the sun was bright, almost too bright for his sore, drunken eyes. He was hoping the limo was already out front so he could hide behind the tinted glass and ignore the sunlight. "Chuck! Chuck!" he could hear a small voice calling his name behind him as he reached for the limo door. Turning around he saw her. Even through his sore eyes he could not mistake her beauty. She was running his way and her beautiful curly locks were flowing behind her as she did. She had on the appropriate funeral attire of course, she was Blair Waldorf after all. With her signature headband present, which he loved as it was something so unmistakingly Blair. She hadn't worn them a lot lately and he had been wondering earlier why? Was it because of what he had done to her? The dethroning of queen B? He had not seen the minions wearing them either. They had seemed to start wearing scarves now. Serena. Great, he thought. If Blair had only known why he had done what he did. Why he had started all of the events that lead to her dethroning. Need. He needed her to need him. All he wanted was to be them again, but more. After what had happened last year he was afraid it would never go back to how it was before that night. But something had gotten in the way. Somewhere in between a feeling got in the way maybe it was… No. No time for that he thought. Ignoring her he turned to get into the limo as she grabbed his arm.

"_What are you doing? "she asked longing for an answer from him._

"_I am leaving "he responded bluntly. _

"_What do you mean leaving?" she said with a questioned look on her face with a slight hint of desperation in her voice. _

"_I can't stand it up there. I can't stand it anywhere right now" He solemnly answered._

_She looked a little puzzled before she said the next thing, he noticed what looked like tears forming in her eyes…" Where will you go?"_

"_I don't know yet. Airport is my next destination after that I just don't know" he said with some doubt. "_

_When will you be back" this time her voice was slightly broken as she looked up at him with those puppy eyes, this time they were looking a little more sad than before and starting to look a little more watery. _

"_I don't know" he whispered as he looked down. "When it doesn't hurt like this anymore" On that note he couldn't stay there anymore…feelings, feelings, feelings, that is all she brought out of him. "Goodbye Blair" he didn't make eye contact with her as he turned around and entered the limo. _

"_Chuck…chuck please…" she begged but he didn't stop to respond to her._

Closing the door behind him he saw her just standing there, looking as if he just broke her heart. He hadn't meant to do this of course, but it was the only way he could get away without answering all of her questions.

"_Where to Mr. Bass" his driver questioned._

"_Airport" he responded._

As they were driving away he wanted one more look of her to take with him. He could swear she mouthed something as the limo drove away, and he thought he could make it out, but that couldn't have been what she said. It didn't matter anymore. He didn't want to feel. And if he registered what she had mouthed as he drove away it would have stirred the most intense feelings he had ever known and right now he was not ready for that.

**______________________________________________________________________**

She couldn't believe what just happened. How could he just leave? She had tried to find out where he was going and he wouldn't budge. Why wouldn't he tell her? She had to know. She couldn't let him go like this. What If he doesn't come back? Oh my god she thought. What if he doesn't come back? But she couldn't budge. Her body had a numb feeling where if she moved she thought it would send tingling sensations all over. She was in shock.

After a few moments she realized what was going on as his limo was pulling away. She thought she saw him look back for a moment and when he did she took advantage of the opportunity and whispered _"I love you "._ She had hoped he saw these words. Because if he saw them he would be back, she knew that if he saw her say those 8 letters 3 syllables he would have known he had won and there was no way he wouldn't come and collect his prize. She didn't know when or how long it would be till she saw him again, but there was hope. And this sent a warming feeling over her and she had never been happier to have lost a bet to Chuck Bass than at this very moment.


End file.
